A Perfectionist Endeavor
Posted in Community, General, Personal Hygiene on Apr 29th, 2008
My relationship with William the alcoloon deteriorated in the final days of our play.
He approached me one night in the smelly underground hallway where I was trying to focus my concentration and rehearse my lines before the performance. I tried to ignore him, but he hovered near me for several minutes and finally blurted, [...]
Posted in Beauty, Community, General, Personal Hygiene on Apr 28th, 2008
Although we may find a way to release ourselves from the obligation of sitting, as described above, it will still be necessary to stand and walk in an upright manner so as to distinguish ourselves from the apes and those who have no manners.
The lead actor in my play is a college student named [...]
Posted in Community, General, Personal Hygiene on Apr 27th, 2008
This advice is directed at myself, this week.
It is hard getting through the day when I know I’ll be performing in the evening. I feel sick with dread from the moment I wake up. I feel tired, and I don’t want to do it.
As soon as I get to the theater, I [...]
Posted in Community, General, Personal Hygiene on Apr 25th, 2008
I had been foolishly reassured by our director’s promise to keep William the alcoloon corralled in the theater on the second night of our play.
I was warming up my voice in a hallway downstairs when William wandered in and asked if he could join me. I tried to teach him some voice exercises, [...]
Posted in Beauty, Community, General, Personal Hygiene on Apr 24th, 2008
This advice particularly applies to those of us who are acting in a play within the next hour.
At the opening performance of our play, I was searching backstage during the first half for William, the aforementioned wealthy reprobate, to give him a suggestion about one of our scenes together. I had seen [...]
Posted in Community, General, Personal Hygiene on Apr 20th, 2008
On the other hand, if we prefer to slump, there is always the chiropractor to look forward to.
We love the chiropractor! Even when he chastises us for slumping. “That is a sitting injury,” he murmurs disapprovingly, staring at our back.
First he embarks on “muscle work”, a euphemism which may find its way [...]
Posted in Beauty, Community, General, Personal Hygiene, Spirituality on Apr 19th, 2008
Have you ever seen ballet dancers’ feet when they take off their pointe shoes? They’re not a pretty sight. I heard a company choreographer give notes to her dancers after a performance, including the instruction, “No more exploding toes!” Nearby in the dressing room lay a pointe shoe with a dark stain spread across [...]
Posted in Community, Family, General, Personal Hygiene on Apr 17th, 2008
We were not the only children in the world who failed to play with our pets as much as we should have. Enchanted by dreams of fur and fluff, we begged to be given a rabbit or puppy or chick, but the realities of caring for a pet every day were not quite as [...]
Posted in Beauty, General, Personal Hygiene on Apr 16th, 2008
Even if we have big, ugly feet, it is good practice to cut off our ugly big toe to fit into the dainty glass slipper. If we fail to do this, we risk losing the prince (who will not consider marrying any but the most beautiful, servile girl with the smallest feet) and missing [...]
Posted in Community, Family, General, Personal Hygiene on Apr 14th, 2008
You may wonder what I can possibly mean when I say that watching television is something we should do better. How can we do it better, you may ask, when it is surely the least demanding of our leisure pursuits? This warning is addressed not to those in the majority who are already avid viewers [...]