#14 Stay Sober (II)
Apr 25th, 2008 by doing better
I had been foolishly reassured by our director’s promise to keep William the alcoloon corralled in the theater on the second night of our play.
I was warming up my voice in a hallway downstairs when William wandered in and asked if he could join me. I tried to teach him some voice exercises, such as rolling his tongue and purring his lips and saying tongue twisters like: “She sat upon the balcony, mimicking and hiccupping and amicably welcoming him in.” He was very amiable and did the best he could, although his mouth did not seem too coordinated.
The director passed through to give us our beginners’ call.
“I’m off for a drink,” said William when the director had gone.
“Do you really think that’s a good idea?” I asked.
“Oh, sure,” he said. “I did it last night, and it wasn’t a problem.”
“I’m not sure it’s a good idea to drink before you go on stage.”
“Don’t worry,” he said genially. “It’ll be fine.”
“I just don’t want you to mess it up for the rest of us.”
He laughed. “Americans are so funny about alcohol.”
“But we’ve worked really hard on this play, and I want it to be good.”
“Campbell and I have been drinking since two, anyway,” he said. “Campbell has had two bottles of wine already.”
“You did a good job last night. You can be proud of yourself. You don’t need to get drunk to give a good performance.”
“I don’t need a drink,” he said. “I’m not an alcoholic. I just want to meet some people.”
My powers of persuasion were exhausted. William approached a fire escape at the end of the hallway but deduced from sign reading “No Entry. Warning. These doors are alarmed” that it was not the way to make an unobtrusive exit. He disappeared upstairs into the wings. I hoped the assistant director would catch him before he escaped.
Alas, we had no such luck. He returned an hour later, drunker than ever. At least he held onto his script and managed to keep his place. He swayed a little and slurred some of his lines, but there was no disaster. (How fitting that he who is too drunk to play a judge will soon be called before a real judge for his drunken crimes.)
After the performance, the rest of us were congratulating ourselves on (we thought) a job well done, when the director and assistant director were spotted in the dressing rooms with dark faces, speaking to William and Campbell (who as well as drinking two bottles of wine had been talking on his phone in the wings during the performance, and some audience members complained). The director later warned all the cast that no one is to leave the theater during the performances or to make any noise in the wings—but honestly, I don’t think any number of threats will keep that boy sober.